Yo mama jokes

Yo' Mama Is So Nasty... Petting Zoo

Yo' Mama is so nasty, the animals at the petting zoo make her wear gloves.

Yo' Mama Is So Ugly... Zoo

Yo' Mama is so ugly, when I took her to the zoo, the security guard thanked me for bringing her back.

Yo' Mama Is So Fat... Time Zone

Yo' Mama is so fat, she wears a watch on each arm -- one for each time zone she's in.

Yo' Mama Is So Ugly... Zits

Yo' Mama is so ugly, her zits don't want to be seen with her.

Yo mama's So Old...Act Your Age

Yo' mama so old, I told her to act her age and she died!

Things Your Mom Would Never Say to You

  1. How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?
  2. Yeah, I used to cut class a lot too.
  3. Let me smell that shirt - don't worry, it's good for another week.
  4. Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I'll be glad to feed and walk him every day.
  5. That outfit isn't sexy enough, here, unbutton your blouse.
  6. Why don't you hitchhike? It would totally be cheaper.
  7. The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It's not like I'm running a prison around here.
  8. Don't clean your room so often. It makes the rest of the house look bad.
  9. Can I borrow your new speed metal CDs?
  10. Naw, you don't have to call me, I'll eventually figure it out if you're in trouble.

You''re So Ugly...Drop-Off

You''re so ugly, when yo'' mama dropped you off at school, she got a ticket for littering!

You're So Ugly... Drunk

You're so ugly, Yo' Mama had to be drunk to breastfeed you.

Yo' Mama Is So Poor... Your Birthday

Yo' Mama is so poor, she dumpster dives for your birthday presents.

I Could Have Been Your Daddy

I could have been your daddy, but the line was too long.