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Cloud Computing Security?! Hitler learns a painful lesson about Cloud Computing Security =))

Colonel: Yesterday our customer database was tampered with. The last name of every customer was changed to "pwnz0red"...Syslogs show the penetration occurred in spite of the 'firewall' system, here. Our Cloud Computing provider claims that this was not thier fault, it was a ... flaw in one of our hosted applications.They say that our code is 'sauerkraut'

Hitler: None of this should be a problem. They passed their PCI Audit and have Antivirus.

Colonel: Mein Führer...the SLA...The SLA says that they take no responsibility because Our SS-skriptstaffeIn used PHP... they said it is our IT department's fault.

Hitler: 'Project Leaders' Meeting: Keitel, Jodl, Krebs and Burgdorf...

Hitler: I asked you if it was SECURE! You told me we could save a lot of money but I asked It, It was SECURE! You said 'even Mussolini is going to the cloud with his MP3 collection'. But: Our Data is important!

Hitler: 'Risk Assessment'...Your 'Risk Assessment' is toilet paper! Your 'Compensating Controls' couldn't even stop Stalin's script kiddies! 'Threat time likelihood times number of attacks equals RISK!'. You said there was a '.4 risks'!! What does that even mean?!

Colonel: Mein Führer - they said they were 'OWASP compatible'

Hitler: My data has been posted from Moscow to Chicago and you talk about standards?!

Colonel: Mein Führer - Standards are important.

Hitler: NO! Security outcome are what is important! What good is your Risk Assessment now? We're "pwnz0red"!!

Hitler: I wanted a WAF. I wanted Identify 2.0 ... a site without SQL injection or XSS... is an 'implementation detail!' You n00b!

Hitler: So how will our cloud service provider... be able to help us now? What is the plan? Maybe we should just outsource fixing this problem to another cloud service?

Maybe another 'RISK ASSESSMENT'? Your SLA is as worthless as your MCSE! Do you know what I should do now? I ought to outsource this to Stalin!!

Hitler: It always looks cheaper until you have ..."unexpected costs" like this...'costs' - like the defeat of our Reich! You n00bs... You fell for a bunch of marketing and slick glossies from some trade-show booth bimbo! You outsourced all our data to a Cloud Computing provider... that hosts in Leningrad? You are GENERALS of The 3rd Reich and you fell for marketing! Like some gen-X idots with venture capital to burn! You said their 'Firewall + SSL' were better than our enigma coding machine!

*whisper* It's OK. He doesn't know you are an MCSE.

Hitler: The world used to tremble in awe of our National Socialist coding skills...now we are just another Cloud Computing entry for 'failblog'. This sucks. Cloud computing killed The Reich. I wish we had kept the mainframe. Goering and I used code in COBOL.....We were good programmers, once. I could be coding this 'Web2.0' stuff in a weekend. I have to go update my Facebook page...

*whisper* Let's not tell him we scheduled him to do a 'webinar' tomorow...

Video Hitler learns a painful lesson about Cloud Computing Security
What is Cloud Computing? This is how A Former Income Tax Commissioner Explains Cloud Computing =))

Vishwa Bandhu Gupta is a former Income Tax Commissioner for the Indian Government. He also discusses why Government should stay away from Cloud computing.

Vishwa: Did you know ... Or does anyone in India know that whenever a meeting is held, by any Board of Directors in America, In any room... that room is concealed for an hour [after the meeting]. Did you know that?

Interviewer: Why?

Vishwa: America has the technology.... that if you leave that room open...any person can bring in an audio machine which can recover the whole meetings' talks .... from the air. Because it is stored in the air... He can record everything. It stays there for an hour...

Vishwa: Third thing I should tell you...Nowadays, the American executives are instructed: "For God' Sake, after using your cellphones, don't sell them to scrap". Do you know how much they are selling for? This is what happens...You may take out the SIM card, this won't solve your problem... SIM card's data transfers into the battery...Please listen to me carefully. SIM card's data, It TRANSMITS. Please understand these processes.

Vishwa: There are so many shops in America just to purchase old phones. All they ask is "Son, Whose [Data] is it?". In America every cellphone company has instructed [users] when they purchase a new phone. Early, nobody knew about this. And if you look at this, you thing everything is in the SIM card. Everything is actually in the SIM card. But from the SIM card...if the battery has been in [the phone] for many days, most of it [data] is passed on. All the secret phone numbers are there...everything is there. And if you will look at this, you live in such a world...which has such technology...

Vishwa: And a fourth thing I should tell you: "The biggest of all: Today, the whole technological system is based on Cloud [CD-ing]". Did you know you don't need any software? For example, if you use Google Mr.Manesh...you see that you can save all your documents on your computer [cloud]. Google's whole software...Have you ever seen Google software CDs being sold?

Interviewer: No?

Vishwa: All of it is in the Cloud[Cloud Computing] (point to the Sky). Its called "Cloud CD-ing". In this new era, all you need is a computer [terminal] which can be connected to the Cloud[Cloud Computing]. With that, all your software and documents will be there. [But] until now, no one has studied yet, Mr. Manesh. That whether during rain... or during a storm... will there be aberrations in it? Let say you made a unique Identity card, for some poor villager, but it was never tested. He gave it to you at that time.But this card won't be made from that [Cloud Computing]...because that would require you to go hundreds of miles in to the jungles. When you made the card there the cloud[Cloud Computing] was fine, the cloud that you seeded...there is a particular "cloud seeding"... the cloud[Cloud Computing] is seeded up there. The Cloud[Cloud Computing] had a certain situation in that climate. But when you started to check the Cloud[Cloud Computing]...where you check it, what if it was raining there? It will give you a fault, saying its not the same person. You would have to arrest him. Let say only 3% of [innocent] people are arrested, or 2%, or even 1%, you arrested the poor guy and held him over night. Where is the efficiency in this? These thing... this is biggest misfortune of our country. That a country like "Britain" who studied this for 8 years, rejected this idea...Saying that technologically we don't have the proof [reliability]. If there is a possibility of an error of 0.000001%. Then I am willing to accept the system. Because no system is 100% reliable.

Interviewer: But this whole system is messed up!

Vishwa: But if there is a 1% or 2% posibility [of error] then you arrested 2% of the guys unfairly and if 2% of the innocent guys are arrested then 2% of the criminals will get away [without consequences]. So this defeats the purpose.

Video Vishwa Bandhu Gupta Explains Cloud Computing
Crazy Ways Social Media Is Changing Your Brain Right Now

With Social Media Sites being used by 1/3 of the entire world, they've clearly had a major influence on society. But what about our bodies? Here are 5 crazy ways that social media and the internet are effecting your brain right now!

Can't log now? Supprisingly, 5-10% internet users are actually unable to control how much time they spend online. Thought it's a psychological addiction as opposed to a substance addiction, brain scans of these people actually show a smilar impairment of region that those with drug dependence have. Specifically, there is a clear degradation of white matter in the regions that control emotional processing, attention and decision making. Because social media provides immediate rewards with very little effort required, your brain begins to rewire itself, making you desire these stimulations. And you begin to grave more of this neurological excitement after each interaction. Sound a little like a drug, right?

We also see a shift when looking at multi-tasking. You might think that those who use social media or constantly switch between work and websites are better at multi-tasking, but studies have found that when comparing heavy media users to others, they perform much worse during task switching tests. Increased multi-tasking online reduces your brains ability to filter out interferences, and can even make it harder for your brain to commit information to memory. Like whe your phone buzzes in the middle of productive work. Or wait ... dit it even ... buzz? Phantom Vibration Syncdrome is a relatively new psychological phenomenon where you think you felt your phone go off, but it didn't .

In one study, 89% of test subjects said they expericened this at least once every two weeks. It would seem that our brains now perceive an itch as an actual vibration from our phone. As crazy as it seems, technology has begun to rewire our nervous system - and our brain are being triggered in a way they never have been before in history. Social Media also triggers a release of dopamine - the feel good chemical. Using MRI scans, scientist found that the reward centres in people's brains are much more active when they are talking about their own views, as opposed to listening to others. Not no surprising - we all love talking about ourselves right? But it turns out that while 30-40% of face-to-face converstaion involve communicating our own expreriences, arround 80% of social media communication is self involved. The same part of your brain related to orgasms, motivation and love are stimulated by your social media use - and even more so when you know you have an audience. Our body is physiologically rewarding us for talking about ourselves online! But it's not all so self involved. In fact, studies on relationships have found that partners tend to like each other more if they meet for the first time online rather than with a face to face interaction. Whether it's because people are more anonymous ar perhaps more clear about their future goals, there is a statistical increase in successful partnerships that started online. So while the internet has changed our verbal communication with increased physical sepration, perhaps the ones that matter most end up even closer.

Video: Crazy Ways Social Media Is Changing Your Brain Right Now - AsapSCIENCE